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An ode to all the fathers in my life

My father Ong Kee Bian with me, on his BSA motorbike – era 1954.

I WAS all of seven months old when my great-grandfather Ong Tiang Swee passed away at the ripe old age of 86, on Oct 19, 1950. He was the son of Ong Ewe Hai (1830-1889) who was the first Ong to have landed in Sarawak from China via Singapore. He had passed on at a much earlier age of 59. I had never known either of them at all.

When I was born in March 1950, my grandfather Ong Kwan Hin was 54 and he had raised a rather big family even for his time – 10 boys and four girls, 14 in total. Together with my parents and siblings, I had stayed in my grandfather’s household till I was eight years old when we moved to our own home just a short distance down the road.

Grandpa passed away at age 86 when I was 32 years old and was already myself a father of three – a boy and two girls.

Grandpa Kwan Hin was a bit of a ‘bon vivant’ in his heyday. He was born at almost the turn of the century in 1896. He lived during the era of the second Rajah of Sarawak, Charles Brooke (1829-1917), third Rajah Charles Vyner Brooke (1874-1963); and had served as the Kapitan Cina under the British colonial administration of Sir Anthony Abell (1950-1959) and Sir Alexander Waddell (1960-1963).

Both Tiang Swee and Kwan Hin were the first two Chinese leaders to be nominated to the Sarawak Council Negri (State Legislative Council) in 1937. My grandpa was born in Kuching on June 4, 1896; he had his education at St Thomas’ School and had joined his father’s bank – the first Chinese bank in Sarawak, the Sarawak Chinese Banking Corporation. His eldest brother Hap Hin had died at a very young age, resulting in him becoming the patriarch of the family.

In 1947, he was appointed the Kapitan Cina. He established businesses in animal husbandry with a dairy and poultry farm and a company named Hiap Soon Hin at 59, Main Bazaar, and was the first and oldest agent for the AIA Insurance Group, until he gave it up in the 1970s.

After the Japanese Occupation, Grandpa became a leading member of many organisations, founding Kuching’s United Merchant Association and served as its chairman for many years; also the Sarawak Chamber of Commerce; Kuching Hokkien Association (1948-58), Hun Nam Siang Tng, and many others. He had devoted much of his life to the Taoist religion and became both an authority and an appointed ‘Guardian’ of the Chinese temples. The British government, in recognition of his years of community service, had named the road leading to his house Ong Kwan Hin Road, which remains to this day.

I remember ‘Ah Kong’ (Grandpa) with fondness – some of his philosophy of life has rubbed off on me – his love for parties and the good life; his obsession with keeping up with the latest news of the day, be it the world at large or the local community; and most of all, his laidback and easy-going manner and his love for his family. He was a real news freak, always listening to the radio, favourite being the BBC (long before television), and the daily newspapers – I would anxiously await his afternoon perusal of The Straits Times (later NST), The Star and other weekly magazines, to read them all from front page to back page (just skipping the sports and adverts pages!)

In turn, I too from a very young age became a news addict!

His many parties were legendary – some would last an entire weekend, from Friday night to Sunday! The booze would flow, food served in abundance and merriment including live musicians would perform. The guests would be from all the different stratas of society – age, gender, and race made no difference to participants and the general merry-making.

Grandpa’s funeral procession in 1982 was one of the most grand and longest that ever took place in Kuching, I remember numerous uniformed bands leading the miles-long affair and that all the full Taoist rights were duly laid out for the historic occasion. His remains were cremated at the Hindu open-air cremation site at Pending and on the third day, we were there to pick the remnant ashes (and some bones) with specially-made elongated chopsticks!

My father, Kee Bian, was the sixth son of Ong Kwan Hin and Wee Geok Sim; he has nine other brothers and four sisters. Dad was born on Feb 22, 1926, which makes him 95 this year!

My father in front of the Statue of Liberty in New York, USA, in 1956.

He had his schooling at St Thomas’ School, as had his elders and all his other siblings (the girls had gone to St Mary’s). Dad and Mum had only become Anglican Christians later in their lives, in the 1980s when they were in their 50s. They were born Taoists/Buddhists; but their parents had given them anglicised names at birth with the intention of sending them to English schools in the early years of colonial rule.

Dad joined the Sarawak civil service in the Department of Agriculture where he was attached to the Fisheries Division. During the early years in the 1950s and 1960s, he was often sent overseas on official work duties, trainings and seminars; I remember that he had visited Canada (Newfoundland and Nova Scotia), Ceylon (present-day Sri Lanka), the Philippines, Taiwan, Indonesia, England, Scotland, United States of America and many more. It was always presents galore for all of us whenever he returned from an overseas trip.

I recall with fondness the summer holidays during school time, when Dad would either pre-book a government launch, speedboat or other transport to take the entire family to either Santubong beach (the senior bungalow whenever it’s available) or a friend’s upcountry retreat with a nice picnic area usually involving pools of pristine chilly waterways, and lots of food and drinks!

During the fruiting season, especially at durian dropping time, we’d venture further afield in search of the ever-elusive basketfuls of the best durians around, be they from Serian, Bau, or Pasir Pandak. We’d all eat till we’d burp durian fumes amidst consuming voluminous amounts of saltwater!

Other times would be to the seaside properties for fresh seafood while checking on Dad’s mud-clams farm.
In trying to replicate this for our children, we would later on with our own families go on trips for picnics to places like Lundu, Pandan, Sematan, Rambugan, Sibu Laut, Batang Ai, Bengoh and even further along the newer roads being built to be eventually the Pan Borneo Highway.

My father (seated), on his 90th birthday, with his five children – (from left) Edwina, Edgar, Edrea, Edric and Dr Edmund.

Every son has a favourite memory of his father and himself during his time spent together from the very young days – mine has always been from the earliest years of seeing my Dad hard at work and at some point in time, having realised that the lines have somewhat blurred between his working life and his own family and leisure time.

Most people are able to leave their workplace and return home to their leisure and simply switch it off. It was only after years of watching and witnessing and experiencing this that I had finally realised that for my father, his work is his life! And that says a lot about him.

After my father had been born again in his early 50s and has found his Saviour in Jesus Christ, he had almost overnight became an evangelical, and has since found his mission for the rest of his life – to ensure salvation for all his family members wherever they may be! To this end, he has met with some success and God-willing, we all pray that this, his final mission would be his most fulfilling.

Dad, Happy Father’s Day to you – not just for today, but for all of your days!